We interrupt your regularly scheduled posting...

...to bring you a very special Friendaversary blog post! I don't think this would be a very good blog about friendship if I didn't take a second to acknowledge that today is Christine's birthday!! When I was thinking about what I wanted to say in this post I remembered the first of her birthdays we celebrated together. She was turning 20, we had a slumber party. A slumber party complete with bribing some of our best guy friends to dress up as the Village People and serenade her. We have celebrated some pretty fabulous birthdays together over the years and I am looking forward to many more. I won't wax poetic too much about how great of a friend Christine is or how much her friendship has meant to me over the years. I think it is pretty obvious. We have a yearly celebration of our friendship. Today, however, we aren't celebrating our friendship, but celebrating Christine. She is is beautiful, driven, and caring. Any any of us who are lucky enough to count ourselves among her friends are so happy to celebrate her today!

Christine's 20th Birthday

Movie Countdown #20-11!

As promised, here's our countdown of the top 20 movies that celebrate female friendships!  Here's how we broke it down.  Together Mary and I picked 20 movies then divided the list up.  We then ranked our own lists from 1-10.  Here are our results!

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Christine's Picks

10. Mystic Pizza (1988)

Flashback to the 80’s!!  This film is where America first fell in love with Julia Roberts and led people on their own quest to find the perfect slice of pizza.  Mystic Pizza is a true bildungsroman, a coming-to-age story about female friends from blue collar Connecticut families.  There’s angst, failed attempts at first love, tragedy, and above all big hair.  This dramatic film will remind of you those times your friends were there for you to pick you up after your first heartbreak.  

 9. Muriel’s Wedding (1994)

O.K. So, this movie is kind of a downer at the beginning, but it does feature an ABBA song within the first ten minutes, some laudable 80’s fashions, and they all speak in Australian accents, so there’s that too.  Overall, I think most of us out there have felt like an outsider in one way or another.  Muriel is the outsider’s outsider.  She’s an anti-hero of sorts that you find yourself strangely rooting for.  Trust me, as the movie picks up and as Muriel finds herself it gets better, then kind of sad again, then really good.   Muriel’s story proves that a good friend can teach us to love ourselves just because they appreciate us.  It also teaches the pitfalls of wasting our sunshine where it’s not wanted.  So swing by Outback Steakhouse, grab a giant Foster’s beer or two, and find Muriel’s Wedding on Netflix.  

8.Waiting to Exhale(1995)

“Sometimes you’ll laugh sometimes you’ll cry/ Life never tells us the when’s or why’s/ When you’ve got friends to wish you well, you’ll find a point when you will exhale.” Sing it songstress, Whitney Houston.  These song lyrics pretty much sum up this amazing movie about powerful women.  Also, who doesn’t want to be Angela Bassett in the movie’s signature scene where she lights a car on fire and looks like Wonder Woman doing it.  This movie was Sex in the City before Sex in the City- granted it’s not set in NYC, but the problems and frank discussions about bedroom activities encountered by the main characters aren’t that different.  As an added bonus, Babyface helped create a soundtrack perfect for setting the tone for a night of gossip and sharing stories- of course interrupted by song breaks where everyone will belt out songs by the likes of TLC, Brandy, the incomparable Mary J. Blige, Faith Evans, Toni Braxton and of course Whitney herself.

7. Gentleman Prefer Blondes (1953)

 I think it’s safe to say that more of us have seen Madonna’s homage to this movie’s signature “Diamond’s Are a Girl’s Best Friend” number than the original and I have to say, if you are one of these women, you are missing out!!!!  Two little girls from Little Rock, Marilyn Monroe and Jane Russell, portray two friends looking for love.  Monroe’s character, Lorelei, just has to behave long enough to get her beau’s wealthy father to give his blessing so the two can marry.  Fortunately, Lorelei has the help of Dorothy who does everything she can to keep her out of trouble.  Be prepared for iconic song and dance numbers, dazzling costumes, and zingy one-liners.

6. Thelma and Louise (1991)

 This is the film on our list that has garnered the most critical acclaim.  Both Susan Sarandon and Geena Davis were nominated for Oscars.  Where do you start with Thelma and Louise?  I think we all know a woman that resembles Thelma or Louise at the beginning of their journey. I don’t know about you, but I’ve thought, “Wouldn’t it be great if this woman who is already pretty cool had total control of her life and choices had a chance to just BE.” Thelma and Louise offers a cautionary/inspirational tale about what can happen when these women finally have their day.  It begs a variation of the eternal question, “Is it better to have loved yourself and lost, than never to have discovered what you are truly capable of?” Now, I know that I’m supposed to be focusing on female friendships, but I have to at least mention that watching Thelma and Louise also means watching a young Brad Pitt.  There I said it.  Back to the important stuff.  Also, after you see the ending you’ll understand a cultural reference.         

Mary's Picks

             

10. Whip It! (2009)

Hooray for a girls’ sports movie!  Bliss lives in a small town in Texas and is looking for something. She’s not really sure what, but the pageants her mother forces her into aren’t cutting it. While taking a trip to Austin, she discover the roller derby team the Hurl Scouts and finds a place where she feels herself. Between the companionship from her teammates and the support of her best friend Pash, Bliss finds some direction in her life. Besides, wouldn’t you want to be friends with Kristin Wiig and Drew Barrymore?

 9. Bend it Like Beckham (2002)

 More sports! More badass ladies being badass!   Jess and Jules have to overcome gender roles, cultural and familial expectations and accusations of lesbianism to find success in soccer, the sport that they love. And apparently necessary to a good girl movie, their friendship has to overcome a guy. Clichéd, I know, but the rest of the movie is empowering. Jules and Jess help each other to achieve their goals, to achieve greatness, to achieve what they know they are capable of despite the obstacles they face. After all, isn't this what a best friend does-help you to reach your full potential?

 8. A Little Princess (1995)

In our research for this list we discovered that there is an inexcusable lack of children’s movies that depict female friendships. Girls can be friends with inanimate objects or animals, even male characters, but not with each other. The Little Princess allows these little girls to bond. Sarah reminds us that we are all princesses no matter what. Sarah and Becky find each other and help each other through some truly heart-wrenching challenges, and like any good princess movie, they live happily ever after.

  

7. Bridesmaids (2011)

While Bridesmaids is touted as the female equivalent to The Hangover, the center of this movie has a lot more heart. There is nothing like a wedding to bring out the crazy in your friends and family, trust. At the center is the story of two lifelong friends who are going through some growing pains. When your best friend gets a new best friend, fear of the relationship changing can be difficult to overcome.  Kristin Wiig’s character deals with this with the total lack of grace that one would expect. But in between the bathroom humor are characters just trying to find their way back to each other within their new dynamic. The high-point of this film is a fantastic Wilson-Phillips sing-a-long!! Any movie with a big musical number is a total win in my estimation.

 6. The Help (2011)

I feel like this movie really highlights the change women can affect when we come together. In Jackson, Mississippi in 1963, Skeeter dreams of being a writer but has yet to find her inspiration. Between her relationship with her family’s African American housekeeper, Constantine, and her budding friendship with Aibileen, the African American housekeeper of her friend, Skeeter begins to notice the poor way these women are treated. Finding her inspiration, she begins to write the stories of these women and others in similar situations. It is the trust and respect these ladies develop that is so inspiring.  They join together to put a stop to inequalities and make things better for future generations.
 

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So, here is the list for now!  Hope we covered some of your faves, but our favorites are yet to come.  We'll post our next 10 picks next week. Can't wait to hear your feedback.   

My Turn. . .

You've heard Mary's side of the story; now it's my turn! My name is Christine and I'm a high school English teacher. (Just because I'm a teacher doesn't mean I have perfect grammar.  Feel free to send me edits or make comments about correct comma placement)  I love my job, my family, and the life I've created for myself. 

Mary and I met the second semester of our freshman year of college.  The timing was perfect.  I'd come to college without any friends and even though I'd met some lovely people that I'm still in touch with, I still hadn't found any friends that I felt were in the new best friend market. . . I'm not sure how making a best friend works, but I think this is part of it.  A mutual friend introduced us by inviting us to dinner.  The first time I saw Mary she was wearing a hot pink trench coat with a light pink shirt.  I instantly thought this girl will either be super annoying or will become my best friend. (I think it's hilarious that both of our first strong memories of each other are polarizing.)   Through dinner we realized we both went to the same church and had some of the same classes.  Over time, we began doing more and more together.  She introduced me to some of her lovely friends and we built a friendship. About a year into our friendship, we were at La Michaocana- a Mexican meat market/mini-grocery store- and I pointed out the fact that we had been friends for a year.  Thus, our friendaversary tradition was born.  On our second friendaversary, a new tradition emerged.  At La Michaocana, we were discussing some of our new bargain clothing purchases and I said I felt bad that I bought stuff for myself, yet no gift to celebrate our friendship.  Mary concluded that since we both purchased something for ourselves that could be our gift since we both wanted the other person to be happy! Rationalization at its best.  Now, I attribute one purchase a year to myself as a friendaversary gift- after all, that's what Mary would want!

Friendaversaries were an integral part of keeping us together after college.  We both moved back to our hometowns after college and were busy trying to sort out our own lives. There were a few years where we didn't see each other often and our friendaversary gave us a reason to absolutely insist that we put everything else aside and get together. I agree with what Mary said about effort whole-heartedly.  I think that's what ultimately kept us friends for these past eight years.  That and fun, laughter, inside jokes, and respect for each other and each other's choices.

We can't wait to hear about how you celebrate your friendships! 

Stay tuned for our list of the top 20 movies that celebrate female friendships! FYI, there are way more movies devoted to male friendships- totally unfair!

History of the World Part I

Your curiosity can be satisfied! We are back with the customary yet much needed introductory post. We decided the best way for you to get to know us is to each share our version of the story…

A quick about me, my name is Mary. I graduated from college with a degree in English in 2008. I am currently back in school to become an elementary school teacher. I have been married to my extremely awesome husband for almost 4 years and our only child is our fluffy white dog named Lola.

Christine and I had 2 classes together as well as a few mutual friends so we had hung out socially, but we were definitely only acquaintance status when we decided to pair up for a project for our Spanish class. It was an oral conversation project. As Spanish was not our strong suit the work was tedious and frustrating and repetitive. Over and over and over again Christine asked me how to say “today” in Spanish. Over and over and over again I told her, “hoy.” My patience was wearing thin. Finally, I reached my tipping point and retorted, “HOY! H-O-Y!!!” She meekly responded, “thank you.” There was a moment of silence where the friendship could have been over before it started. Luckily, Christine is made of tougher stuff than that and we persevered to make an A on the conversation and it was a turning point in our relationship. Anyone that you can semi-yell at and they still want to be around you is probably someone you are not going to ditch easily.

From that point on we were close to a package deal. We were both members of a Catholic women’s group, both English majors with classes together and we lived in the same dorm. When we ended up with rooms across the hall from each other things got a little ridiculous. Because Christine was a Resident Assistant she would literally get the spare key to my room and let herself in to use my computer. We would open both our doors to approve each other’s outfits. I was almost as familiar with her closet as my own. Road trips and adventures soon followed. We survived jerk-face guys and friends who turned out not to be so great, bad grades and bad hangovers, graduation and marriage.

Christine is the one who really came up with the concept of a friendaversary. Our friendship has been such constant in our lives. I’ve “been with” Christine longer than my husband. Isn’t that a feat that somehow deserves recognition? There isn’t a day when you show appreciation for the people who have helped you through your lows and celebrated your highs. So we made up one. I’m not sure exactly when we first started celebrating friendaversaries. But we would go to the La Michoacana and have a torta. Then we would buy our own gift instead of exchanging because the joy of shopping was the gift. Since then it has become a tradition. We have had dinner dates; last year we went to the opera. We try to make the day we choose to celebrate special. My husband understands that; he shares me with my friends. Our running joke is that Christine and I go on more romantic dates than he and I do.

I think the reason our friendship has endured after we graduated is because we make it a priority. There are plenty of people that I adored that I have lost touch with but Christine and I, and a few of our other friends, put in the extra effort to see each other regularly. We share in each other’s lives, in the big and small things and that’s what keeps us close. I know that Christine and I’s friendship is going to endure because we both want it to.

If you found this blog, you are our kind of girl...

So you want to have a friendaversary?

On the eve of our eighth friendaversary, we wondered how other ladies celebrate their friendships. So we turned to Google. The results were pretty dismal. Discovering that the concept of a friendaversary had been legitimized by UrbanDictionary.com we knew we were not alone. However, there was an absence of a comprehensive resource to assist in the execution of an appropriately fabulous occasion. We felt our first 7 friendaversaries provided us with a pool of experiences to share.

We know we are not alone in thinking that amazing friendships are worthy of being recognized. We hope to unite and inspire ladies everywhere to start celebrating each other. Celebrating the women who have been the witness to your experiment with bangs, the person who dried your tears after that jerk didn't call, the friend who is not afraid to give you their real opinion,  the wind beneath your wings.

We are excited to share our story as well as hear about how you honor the person who was somehow not born as your sister, but you were lucky enough to find anyway! In your face, Fate! Our hope is that through the ideas shared here friendaversaries will become Oprah & Gayle's next Favorite Thing!

Thanks for starting this adventure with us! We are going back to commemorating 8 years of being awesome!

Until next time!
Christine & Mary

NEXT TIME: The mysterious we  is introduced properly.